i've got the strangest feeling...

...i've been here before. right here, this very spot. ah, yes- now i recognize it. UNEM@#$(%*PLOYMENT.

"what an exciting opportunity!"

(...didja buy it? me either.)

sarcasm aside, it's hard to be positive when you're drowning. the bright side- that little circle of light high above- gets proportionally smaller as the hole gets deeper. this is The Nature of Things.

seeing as how i've been down this road before, and have a fairly good idea what to expect, you'd think i'd be better prepared (at least emotionally!). but i'm not.

so...nothing profound. sorry if that's a let-down after a 3-month absence. but then...no one reads this anyway. painting white canvas white in a pitch black room.

foggy mornin' in the Pacific Northwest

Chowder sleepin' under my chair.   good dog.   supposed to be half border collie half black lab.   doesn't really look like either.   let 'im lie.   draft from the door to the garage behind me.   gotta fix that one of these days.

coffee's already gone.   17.2 smokes left.   Marlboro UL 100s, for anyone curious.   if i smoke enough of 'em maybe they'll stop tastin' like crap.   light 100s already do.   too bad they don't make superultralight 100s; then i could drag out quitting even longer.

EXACTLY two weeks unemployed.   should finally get my first [gasp] $208 unemployment check this week.   any luck at all and the next one will come in after i'm workin'.   i applied for 28 jobs in the last two days.   no response.   i was even qualified for some of 'em.   no, really, i was- i have skills, just not marketable ones.   need something built?   i'm yer guy.   need yer computer fixed?   call me.  need heavy crap lugged between points A & B, over C and through D, without trampling E?   no problem.   need an in-depth analysis of Western scales and modes as pertaining to playability on guitar?   c'est tout bon.

20 years reading anything i can get my hands on, gaining expertise with scores of industrial tools, exploring All Things Creative, expanding mind and skill with monomaniacal fanatacism....

i'm gonna end up lugging heavy crap around all summer again.

Chowder just groaned.   time to make more coffee.

no sun today.