a very strange dream

Scene 1:
i remember nothing about the setting. i was with my mom and dad. they told me that both my sisters, both my brothers-in-law, and both my nephews were dead due to a boating accident which occured during a move from Hawaii to the mainland. the boat was Chris's, and i couldn't understand why Chris and the others had chosen to try to cross the ocean in it. they seemed to have taken this course of action due to circumstances which precluded all others. i was shocked beyond words; so shocked i didn't even feel grief. the whole thing felt surreal; i couldn't believe it. i found myself grasping for details, as if an increased understanding of those might help me understand the whole.

Scene 2:
i was in a mall after hours with a blonde ex-girfriend that might have been my ex-wife but was more likely another girl from another train-wreck relationship. the lights in the mall were off, and we were sitting at a table in what appeared to be the food court. i was discussing the deaths of my family members with her. a part of me felt like even discussing this with her was wrong; as if talking about it was an attempt to garner sympathy, even though that wasn't my intent.

Scene 3:
the location changed to a residence, of which i remember nothing except that it was dark. it had been a long time since our prior relationship; it was as if the temporal setting was the present. the ex-girlfriend figure was much heavier than she was in the past. we were having sex. i clearly remember being on my back, the ex-girlfriend on top. she had a rather large roll around her middle, which i grasped with both hands and commented on. i couldn't stop thinking about my sisters and noticing that even with a tragedy of this magnitude, i was comforted by the fact that my son was still alive.

Scene 4:
i kept discussing the deaths of my sisters and their families endlessly with my parents, trying to make some sense of the whole thing.

note: this dream is about the closest i ever get to a nightmare. while i occasionally experience extremely negative or intense things in my dreams, my fear or stress is generally somewhat muted. i tend to back up and "replay" things i'm having trouble handling, sometimes changing the outcome by running a different scenario until i run into one that i can find a way to deal with- though the higher my stress level in the dream, the less likely i am to do this. when the subject matter is far enough outside of anything i'd normally imagine, i usually get carried along with the flow.

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